Monday, August 04, 2003

Like Morton salt, I am iodized and in a blue cylinder 

Like Morton salt, I am iodized and in a blue cylinder. <--- Title that doesn't show up on here when you view it. 

I realize that I haven't blogged much on this here site as of late, probably causing countless tens of you to stop logging in, since I have appeared to abandoned this shrine to my own ego. Fear not, brave internet readers, I am alive and well. I've just been pre-occupied. So much for updating every now and again just any old thing. I really do need to learn to just post SOMETHING, no matter what it is. It's just that when things happen in my personal life, I tend to not write about it here, but in other forums, because I do like to keep secrets from some of you. Not that you won't find it all somehow anyway.

a smart person (John Lennon, Matt has informed me --- ed.) once said "Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans." After the past week or so, I have no choice but to agree. I thought I had it all figured out when life threw me another curve. Pretty much right on cue, almost exactly a year later, a certain moth got real close to my flame, only to fly away at the last moment, out of the reach of my net...again. If I wanted to, I could set my watch to it. I guess some people just get off on the thrill of the chase, and get disinterested in really getting close to someone else. Maybe it's fear. Like how on the show "Ed," Carol was so afraid that because she could not possibly be the ideal Carol that Ed had imagined for two years of trying to be with her, that she would let him down and it would destroy her chance for happiness. So she just repeatedly turned him down. Then the minute he was happy with someone else, she fought tooth and nail to get him "back."

I really thought that the kiss might have changed things, but, as usual, it proved to just reinforce certain simple truths that cannot be changed. Maybe someday she will stop running. But not today. No matter. I see now, after the events of the past week, that the kiss was more symbolic of me crossing a bridge, literally and figuratively, and conquering some of my fears and my timidness. It's as if night turned into day and I now smell of confidence when once I smelled of the fear. Apparently, it really is tangible.

What happened, you ask, that has changed my tone and tune? Well, to be perfectly honest, but without revealing too much, I went to a going away party for my friend Darren and I did not go home alone. I've even seen her again since Sunday, and she even calls me. It was completely unexpected, but thus far a pleasant surprise. The air must have been rife with the smell of J-Ro's newfound self-confidence, because instant flirting with a member of the fairer sex usually involves music geekdom and goes nowhere, because most music geeks know nothing of romance. And god, I know, I'm one.

I can prove to you that I am a music geek, because I had a disappointing disagreement with Bryce tonight over Come Down. First off, Let me say that I think they are fucking amazing, and perhaps my favorite band from LI, ever. Possibly because I am quite familiar with their influences, and can appreciate what they take from their influences, and how they shape them into something original. Bryce, whom I happen to like a lot as a person, proved to me tonight that his musical knowledge, albeit the music knowledge of an 18 year old, is not up to the par I expected from him.

After witnessing the same set I did of Come Down, his only statement was that he felt that they took the long experimental parts of OK Computer and just mined that territory. I guess since they aren't influenced solely by The Smiths, Joy Division, Jawbreaker and Red House Painters, they somehow fall below his radar. Nevermind that two of the band members are assistant editors and writers for a top notch music magazine, and that all of the band members have impeccable taste in music, and a smattering of influences well beyond the scope of a reformed DIY punk kid just back from a year of college. I don't even necessarily think you have to be familiar with a majority of their influences to realize how amazing a band Come Down is. But your mind should at least be open to something different.

The thing I felt worst about tonight was that I was on my lunch break, so I really couldn't stick around and chat with anyone. I just hope that nobody thought I was being rude when I cut them short or disappeared rather abruptly. I really did sneak out the back door to leave. And I was really late getting back to work, much to the chagrin and disappointment of my supervisor.

But the main reason I wrote this was to just let you all know that everything is coming up J-Ro for the time being. It's just that what I have isn't what I thought I had, and maybe what I thought I had isn't really what I needed.

Thanks to With Every Idle Hour for a kickass set of mostly new tunes from a very kickass new record. I listened to it a few times tonight when I got back to work, and it even impressed several of my colleagues. I was glad I got to drop in on the excitement and witness the rock fury. \m/

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